Successfully parenting our kids with FASD's isn't about making the right decisions in every situation or handing every behavior in one certain way. I tried that and it's an understatement to say that I failed. I failed spectacularly because parenting the kids under our roof well (both those with FASD's and those without) needs to be a big picture understanding of where each one started, where they are today and where they are headed. It's about knowing the tendencies and potential (good and bad) of each one and making the necessary course adjustments as they go through daily life. This type of parenting isn't about 'rules' and 'standards' it's about flexibility, knowledge and determination.
It's like being a cowboy working out on the range vs an employee at a commercial milk production facility. The cowboy responds to every storm cloud, injury, rattle snake and potential stampede while the milker follows rules, washes hands, reads handbooks and keeps the herd moving smoothly through the shoot.
I like to think of my kids with FASD's as free range long-horns. Wildly beautiful, unique and just a tad unpredictable.
I love my wild things.