Robin asked me this question after I posted on our recent bathroom focused impulse control issues:
"If you know it is an impulse control problem, how do you handle the incident? I totaly understand and agree with moving the items for prevention, but do you do any consequences for, say squeezing out all the toothpaste? "
I'm starting to giggle here just thinking through answers to this one.....consequences? Sure.....
Like Screaming at them to stop feeding it to the baby? (It's poisonous!)
or
Repeating over and over again to the son with autistic patterns as I move him away from the toothpaste and toward the toilet...Yes you are in trouble and STOP don't pee on my feet!!!
or
Making all involved parties stand in the bathtub with their hands against the wall (vs all over each other) while I get enough toothpaste (mixed with bath salts) off the floor to allow them to leave without making trails?
or
Plopping their little bottoms on the counter and stomping back and forth in front of them lecturing on the appropriate use of toothpaste? (their eyes glazed over the whole time and nothing sinking in...but it sure makes me feel better)
or
Sending them all to their rooms so that I can take a hot bath in my 'minty fresh' bathroom before I start cleaning it up?
Yep, we have consequences for impulse driven behaviors...but they look and feel way different from those we enforce for our neurotypical kids. It just isn't fair to punish them the same for something they work so hard to master and fail at so often.
4 comments:
Love this blog entry... especially the last part for punishing them for something they try so hard to master... Love reading your blog... keep them coming :)
The first time I saw your blog, I looked at the picture of your family and thought, "Wow..now I have to read about this family and realize that they have a perfect handle on all these kids while I can't even manage 4.
I'm glad you can relate...lol! We can't look at this through a normal prism. I have not figured out a way to manage soap, toothbrushes, toothpaste, etc. for a group. I tried it where they each had their own bin...twice. No. Nothing stays in the bathroom. Everything is destroyed.
Yet, I am so happy not to have to constantly call the plumber for drains clogged with...anything you can imagine.
We just had the plumber out. . . hopefully our sink will be clear for awhile. I guess no Christmas cards this year. I will send out a mass email! :0)
so intrigued by this part: Yep, we have consequences for impulse driven behaviors...but they look and feel way different from those we enforce for our neurotypical kids". Can you recommend some of your posts in particular or somewhere to read that would speak to this and how it looks different? I hear so many people says its different, but have yet to find out "how"
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